Compassionate human beings, are we…(thank you Yoda! lol!). They beg for forgiveness, we forgive. It’s a good cycle, generally. When it pertains to a psychopath, it’s the WORST thing you can do!!!
When I tried to break up with my X (before I truly realized just WHAT he is), he sent me a 4-page email, telling me how depressed he was, and used that as an excuse for all the tormenting, following, ignoring, etc..that he had done. He (this is SICK) actually told me that he talked to my deceased father, to apologize for mistreating me. It was all an act..all the way down to the tears he showed. Keep in mind, psychopaths are INCAPABLE of feeling emotion!!! They mimic what they have seen, as it pertains to seeing whatever sick con-game through, that they view as necessary.
I remember a time that I was at his house. He and I were watching a movie when he got the call. The voice on the answering machine said “Mom and [step-dad] have been in a car accident…they are at [the] hospital, pretty banged up…” We were sitting less than 10 feet away from the phone. He just sat there. I told him, thinking the reason for the non-reaction COULD possibly be because he didn’t want to offend me (excuses), “It’s ok if you want to call…you aren’t going to bother me in the least!”. His reply?? “Oh, it’s just more emotionalism and drama” and he didn’t move a muscle or show any type of concern. Then all of a sudden, a few weeks later, pulls out the “I’m depressed” card. Something I learned about him…he uses the victim role to gain people’s trust…to make them believe his lies…it’s a cover-up.
I’ve tried, begged, and longed for the ability to HATE HIM!! The thing is, I’m completely unable to hate him… In order to do so, first I have to view the “person” as HUMAN. Fact is, I don’t. He’s not human, doesn’t show any human characteristics…only those that are part of his twisted facade, which he uses with cunning skill…like a lion after a small calf.
When I chose to give him another chance, it gave him more ability to find other things about me (I openly told him several things) that he could use as fuel to keep me teetering, and use against me to “prove” his integrity in the relationship to others. What a F***ed up individual!
It is OK to NOT FORGIVE.
In many religious upbringings, we have been taught that forgiveness is morally required of us.
I am convinced that the only reason that Jesus ever said such a thing is that he NEVER encountered anyone with Anti Social Personality Disorder or any other Cluster B Personality Type!
Forgiving the person in my life…
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