A little encouragement..

Sometimes it’s hard to stop the swell of painful, negative memories. Don’t get me wrong…as early survivors, we NEED to dwell, think, and fight to understand what we just went through in order to process it and move on. It’s part of the healing process. There is no correct time limit for this part to be over, and every human processes things differently and in their own time. If it seems to be taking longer than your neighbor, don’t sweat it. When we are tired of rehashing everything, we will start trying to fill our thoughts and life with more wonderful, beautiful things.












I found this online today, and it really touched something inside. Everyday we will continue to struggle out of the negative thoughts that fight for the fore-front. There again remains our choice to succumb or to be free today. This is a daily choice. Once the choice is made, then it’s up to us to fill the negative swell with something positive. We need to end each day with a pleasant thought.

I love this: Live in the present and make it so beautiful, it will be worth remembering.

I’m issuing a challenge, and I’d like to hear what you discover in 1 week, 2 weeks and so on…

We all need to find a way to make EVERY day beautiful in some way.

How will you make today and each day beautiful? It can be in something you do. Spend the day with a friend you haven’t seen for quite some time. Smile at a stranger. Walk in the park. Do what makes you feel beautiful and blessed.

I’m truly excited about this one! I am expecting some changes in my own life as a result. Let me know what you find out 😀




14 thoughts on “A little encouragement..

  1. This could not be timed more perfectly. I’m struggling right now. I believe this will help me refocus. Today, I’ve tried to drop a few encouraging words here and there.

    1. I’m glad, Judy! This one kind of goes along with choosing to be a survivor. Even the smallest things can make a difference in someone, but especially in us. We may never know what we do or say to someone can make just the right difference for them. At the same time, we KNOW we need that moment in time. it makes US feel so WONDERFUL inside! We deserve to feel good, every single day of our lives. What better feeling to know that we have been allowed to make a difference for someone else! Remember the concept of the domino effect? I thoroughly believe that.

      Today, I was entirely selfish, but it was exactly what I needed. I spent the day cleaning my house, the turtle’s abode, and lighting scented candles all around. It has been wonderful! I look around once again and can say that I’m FINALLY proud of my home :D!

  2. I don’t thinking healing is possible without helping others. It’s natural for us to get to this point. At least, I THINK it’s natural because so many of us on this journey are reaching that point or have reached it. You have accomplished so much in a very short period of time. It’s amazing!!! I still get angry but it’s fleeting. (Thank God!) I have fewer episodes of sadness over what my son endured, and I think one day soon there will be no episodes at all! Helping other and doing good will definitely help reaffirm and deepen our healing. I’ll be sure to make even more of an effort now. Thanks for the post! 🙂

    1. I started getting to this point within a couple of months after leaving my X. In a way, it was something I came up with in order to reaffirm who I AM, and who I thought he stole from me. I felt like a stranger in my own body. I was overwhelmed with horrible memories and echos of his voice. I started in an attempt to drown out his influences. I hit a plateau a little too early. Maybe I wasn’t completely ready for this step, then. I don’t know. Every day, since, has brought something I thought I had lost. A lesson I needed to be reminded of, and so on.

      Today, I have lived enough “hum-drum” days. I have lived enough of monotony in my life, and knew there was more to who I am as a viable human being. I have dreams I haven’t even tried to see through. But most of all, I was stuck in a negative whirlwind and wanted OUT! In some sick twisted way, the jack-ass did me a favor.

      I think if all of us did more, even to do more for ourselves every day, we will be able to become who God intends us to be…who he intended all along.

      GO US! 😀

      1. I agree with everything you said except the part about him doing you a favor. No way! You, me, and others who are helping others have always been on the path to helping others. The narcissists/sociopaths delayed our growth and kept us away from our cores, hiding our true selves from the world through their selfishness and control. My X would always claim his ex-wife was far better off than she was before he married her. I thought his thinking was sick. I thought he was convinced he was somehow superior by being an asshole. I think she was superior for having dealt with him for as long as she did and to make the most of the garbage pile in which he tossed her. I’d rather look at it like we (you and I) did ourselves a favor by falling in love with the unloveable and then recognizing that falling in love with them was a HUGE mistake in the first place. We invited the lesson into our lives because our subconscience knew we were ready to tackle the monster all by ourselves. Hehe! We were always heroes. 🙂

    1. Of course, Ruth 🙂 You touched on the main reason for the challenge…to feel richer for the experience. that also includes a wonderful way of drowning out negative influences in our lives. I took a chance today. I invited one person from work and his wife over for lunch. We had a wonderful time, and I feel like I really can trust him better. Talk about reaching beyond my comfort zone! lol!!

  3. Pingback: Sharing another post… « The Project: Me by Judy

  4. Pingback: Encouragement for a challenge… « My journey of healing from psychological abuse

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