This will be short…
Over the holidays, it is generally, socially acceptable and accepted to show good will toward others, including enemies. There’s really no social distinction separating anyone from that cordiality. We were raised to be polite and caring over the holidays, especially. Does that include our Narcissistic ex’s? Psychopaths? Any kind of abuser? NOOOO!!
Since Narcissists are so good at projecting a caring, warm, sincere persona to everyone, the choice not to return the well-wishes, or initiate them, will seem as though you are over-reacting or being rude, to others who are watching. You might feel pressured to return the wishes, just because of the guilt associated with NOT returning them. For your sake, do NOT initiate or return ANY thoughtful gesture or well-wishes over the holidays. They are counting on your polite and caring nature to guilt you into responding (reacting). If you do break ‘no-contact’ to be polite, what will happen? Chances are, you’ve already been there and know the abuse that follows, even months down the road. You will become ensnared again, and the abuse always, ALWAYS comes.
The monsters will try to use the Holidays to bait you into reacting. It’s THAT action, and the impending mental/emotional barrage that will follow as a result, which is the whole reason that you should NEVER EVER break no-contact, even over the holidays!!
If you are being successful in staying ‘no-contact’, congratulations!!! If it’s only been 3 days… CONGRATULATIONS!! Give yourselves a pat on the back, and a favorite chocolate bar!! You’re doing well 😀 Don’t break ‘no-contact’ for any reason. Ever.
I’ll delve into this subject a little deeper, later.
Happy Thanksgiving to all!