The other day I had an incident with my most recent ex, at work. I have to get the key to my vehicle from my manager’s office, every morning. My ex was flippantly standing in the doorway, preventing me from just walking past without needing to be cordial. I said, “excuse me”, as he stepped slightly to the side, letting me pass him. He said, “permission to speak?” I said, without hesitation, “NO!”.
That ended that, or so I thought. I delivered to my boyfriend’s shop, directly after that. I told him what happened. I didn’t see it as that big of a deal until he informed me, “I got a call from your ex a few mins ago.” My ex told him that he wanted to let him know about it, before I had the chance to talk to him about it. He (my ex) told my boyfriend that all he wanted to do is offer condolences because of my dog’s passing away. My boyfriend told me, “I think his intentions were good…” I let him know, “No, they weren’t.”. My boyfriend let me know later that he called my ex back. He told me, “You’re right. His intentions weren’t good, since he already knows you don’t want any contact from him…” He let my ex know that I don’t care about his well-wishes and want no contact from him, whatsoever. He threatened my ex that if he didn’t leave me alone, he would be the one to take it to corporate.
I love this man!
Chum. It’s meant as a lure to bait in fish. The bait is meant to ensnare and capture. Chum causes the consumer to drop their guard, and potentially trust the person again. Chum. I recognized it as soon as my boyfriend let me know what was said over the phone, to him.
My ex didn’t even like my dog..
Chum.. even as a nice caring gesture, it’s still meant to lure you in. If it is to offer condolences, it’s still chum. I mean as it is presented by a Narcissist or Psychopath. They don’t care about your feelings. At ALL! It’s meant to cause you to drop your guard again. Most people mean it as a caring gesture, to be nice and empathetic. We all know that the disordered individuals have no REAL empathy!
Don’t fall for it. Don’t take a bite. Walk away. It’ll seem rude to others around you. Still, don’t fall for it. Stay away, and stay safe from the already WELL known cycle you have personally seen from the individual. Recognize it for what it is.