Combating negative self-talk

I wanted to address this topic, as I think it is a huge factor in how abuse survivors heal. It’s also major in the general populous, as negative self-talk keeps people from achieving their dreams, fighting for what they believe in and so-on. As I begin this post, I think about all aspects surrounding habitually negative, self-talk. Where it begins as children, continues throughout adolescence and on into adulthood. I believe we learn to cling to it, through conditioning, from the beginning of our lives.

It’s our own self-flogging ritual.

Negative self-talk is pure poison. It’s decrepit in it’s design, implementation and is highly toxic to individuals, as well as society as a whole. It robs us of our dignity and  self-confidence, while keeping us from thriving in an, otherwise, wonderful existence. It’s addictive, paralyzing and highly contagious for many around us, including our own children.

With all of these things, why in the world to we cling to it? It’s so very difficult to shut off the repetitive drones, going off during the calmest and quietest of times. It’s imperative for our own well-being, to fight to resolve it and overcome.




3 thoughts on “Combating negative self-talk

  1. What I found so insidious about negative self-talk, once I started paying attention to it, is that it seems to launch of on its own, unlike active thinking where you are generating the thoughts yourself, (at least in my case, I don’t know if this is also the case for other people). Is as if someone else had put a tape in there and it just plays by itself.

    1. I have found the same to be true, Kara. Negative self talk, or even another’s negative input, becomes conditioned. I learned years ago that the mind can be retrained. Knowing that, doesn’t make the battle easier, though. The worse times, for me, are during quiet times. My mind has a tendency to fill in the silence, replaying arguments or what-have-you.

  2. I agree with Kara and life begins posts where the negative self talk seems to just be there, it isn’t a purposed thought. For me, my mind seems to wake daily and live in the world of feeling not being good enough, not wanted, not liked, not loved, that I am a bother to others, that I don’t matter to anyone that much . . . this has been with me my whole life and seems to be getting more consuming. I have been in counseling for several years, don’t see any change in my thinking pattern. My counselor has just finished training for EMDR and I am going to begin this new approach to becoming free of these lies I have believed all my life and continue to effect my daily feeling of having to put on a happy face and act like I am all “good” when inside I am feeling shattered and broken and long for the feeling of secure love.

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