I haven’t produced many posts, lately. I would apologize for that, to my followers but I see no need to, really. As humans we know just living life brings many MANY changes, from day to day. Some are miniscule, some are gargantuas. Regardless, change brings stress, growing pains, and new life. Today, I find myself really challenged and heartbroken.
Back in January, we had my little 3 month old grandson come to live in our home. The circumstances would break anyone’s heart, as a mother. I won’t get into the details surrounding the placement of our grandson, but know that it has torn me apart. I have a responsibility to my adult children, to fight for them, support them and correct them when needed. That responsibility becomes threatened when they do not show responsibility for their own lives, or that of their families and children. When our grandson came to live with us, my role changed drastically. Even though I was still pulling for my daughter to make the right decisions, my ultimate responsibility moved to being the provider and protector of this beautiful baby boy. He is now 9 1/2 months old, still away from his mommy. I have supported my daugher throughout this ordeal, loving her unconditionally and offering reassurance and advice. She still won’t take care of her personal life in order to bring this baby home, legally. This breaks my heart. My role has changed, now, in that I have to make some hard decisions. She has made up my mind as to which direction I need to take this situation and how I should handle my relationship with her. Unfortunately, I have had to go “no contact” with her, recently.
My first born. My beautiful baby girl has to become a stranger to me, now. I wish it was different, I really do.
Recently, she began trying to lie and manipulate me into allowing the baby to be increasingly in unsupervised and unprotected areas. I need to explain a little. He was removed by the state and placed in our custody as a “relative-placement”, due to unhealthy situations which put him in danger. All contact is predetermined by the state, in a supervised environment. She has been trying to convince me that “it’s ok” to change places, because someone else said. Dr visits, change of building for counseling, Etc. Her lies became increasingly obvious, as I double checked everything she planned or suggested, with those other parties, directly. She didn’t know I have all of their phone numbers. Daughter, I’m not that stupid. Since she’s trying to manipulate me, I cannot trust her any longer. She’s becoming desperate, and that is the reason for it. As a mommy, I fully understand her heart, right now. But that doesn’t make it right. What she is suggesting would allow it to be easier to snatch the baby and run with him, placing him in grave danger. I won’t allow it. I am his protector and I will fight any entity to ensure his safety. Even if that entity is my daughter.